Q.   My husband cheated on me and we stayed together, but then I cheated on him.  We've both been honest about our infidelities and want to move forward, but I'm not sure we can, as we keep rowing about what happened.


A.   Use this as a wake-up call.  Focus on the important stuff, like trying to stay together.  If you want to move forward, you can't bring up the past every time you argue.  It's important for partners to learn to listen to each other.  Take time out to actually think about what your man says.  You may score a few points with put-downs and revenge, but how is that good for either of you, let alone your relationship?  Punishing each other with cheating means you are two individuals in a battle, not two partners in a relationship. Instead, focus on what you can do to strengthen your bond.