Thursday, March 15, 2012

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for four years, but I recently got in touch with my ex, who I still have strong feelings for.  We want to be more than friends, but I don't want to hurt my current partner.  What can I do? 

A.   Old flames can often be viewed through rose-tinted glasses, especially if your current relationship has become predictable.  You've been hit by a surge of excitement - part of it feels wrong and part of it feels nostalgic.  The problem is, you've forgotten why you split up with your ex in the first place.  It's always a good idea to look back and put this into perspective. They call it a break up because usually some part of it was broken.   Ask yourself if you were to invest more energy into your current relationship, how would you feel?  Decide where your heart truly lies.  Is it with the ex or your partner? Which relationship deserves a second chance?  And if you're not sure about either, is it time you had some space alone?  

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