Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Q. I recently started sleeping with a married man who has two children and another on the way. He says the marriage has been very bad for a long time and he's wanting to leave soon. I've heard him on the phone to his wife and it didn't sound good so I left him to it and went outside. I love him so much. Will anything ever come of it? Will he ever leave?

A. In short - No! Whenever we eavesdrop on phone conversations we only hear one side of the conversation. If he knew you were around he was hardly going to sound loved up with her was he? For all you knew, after you left the room, he could have apologised for being rude to her, and blamed the pressures of work. He is playing you and playing her. If you could control your emotions and not love him then it could work for you too, but unfortunately you've crossed the line and fallen for him, and we are all capable of doing that.

I date married men, everyone knows that, and I manage to control my emotions, but you need to see the bottom line here, and it may well hurt to read it. He is a father of two and one on the way. If his marriage is so bad, and he hates her so much, and he wishes he wasn't there, then why is there one on the way? You do know where babies come from don't you?

I'm sorry if it sounds blunt but you're better off elsewhere, married men have affairs, married men sometimes leave, but its rare. He won't leave as long as there's a reason to stay there, and another baby may well be the reason he needs. He's enjoying the adoration he gets from you, but he has still managed to get his wife pregnant, so maybe its not as bad as he makes out. Sooner or later the penny will drop, enjoy the fun while it lasts, but I suggest you start to distance your feelings if that's possible. I know how difficult it is when you're in love, but for your own sake, its best to face the reality of an affair.

When its good, its very very good, but when its dishonest its horrid :(

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Q. I love my man dearly and we have great sex - until it comes to penetration. I never cum that way with him and I know its because he's a bit on the small side.

A. If his part is, er, compact, then try the 'scissor position' for maximum penetration sensation. Lie on your side with one leg raised in the air (see where the name comes from?), then get him to kneel either side of the flat leg and enter you. He can either lean on one arm, or not support himself, and that leaves his hands free to stimulate other parts of you, stroking your leg or playing with your clit at the same time. That way he's not just relying on his penis to give you pleasure. Remind yourself that most women don't cum from penetration alone. Great sex is about much more and a mini-manhood has its advantages - like easier oral sex :)

Monday, May 18, 2009

Q. My boyfriend is actually too considerate in bed. He fiddles about so much, nibbling me on the neck and taking ages to enter me when I just want to get down to it.

A. The solution? Surprise him by taking the initiative. Next time you see him jump start the sex, be ready and waiting in sexy underwear, push him on the bed and rip his shirt open. Pull his zip down and get to work on him. Being on top shows him you enjoy 'action', but you must get him to join in too. Ask him to play with your nipples, to kiss you harder, to take what he wants. The trick is to heat things up in whatever way possible but not make him feel like Barry Boring when it comes to sex by complaining about it. If you don't let him dictate the lovemaking style all the time, he should soon get the message, and might actually enjoy the occasional quickie.