Q. Sex with my boyfriend was brilliant - until we got married. Now he hardly ever initiates sex and it's hard work turning him on. Is he freaking out about being married?

A. He could be in post-wedding panic, but stress, insecurity and illness are all passion killers too. The word libido describes a lust for life as well as desire - before you assume he's regretting marriage, ask yourself if he's his usual self out of the bedroom. He's probably as freaked out by his flat-lining lust as you are. I know it can be difficult, but talk to him. Sit together on the sofa after dinner and bring the subject up gently. Be supportive but also be clear that you're not prepared to ignore the problem any longer.