Q. Me and my very liberated mates recently admitted to each other (after a few beers) that we hate anal sex. We agreed it's painful, messy, humiliating and unromantic. Are we missing a trick or is every woman who says they like it just lying?

A. I've known many women who've said they genuinely enjoy anal sex - with the right person and under the right circumstances. I've no reason to think they were lying, but this very intimate act isn't on everyone's sex menu, regardless of what you might hear. My question is, why are all doing something you hate? Have women learnt nothing? What about your pleasure? You say you're 'very liberated' but then bend over backwards to please your menfolk. Where's the freedom in that? Sexual liberation is about rights - the right to have the sex you want with whom you like, the right to protect yourself from pregnancy and the right to say no. Come on ladies - haven't we been shafted by sexist ideals long enough? Do what you like to do and not what he demands. But if it's done right, slowly and with plenty of lubrication, it shouldn't be painful, messy, humiliating or unromantic, it can be amazing, erotic and exciting.