Monday, April 25, 2011

Q. When my boyfriend tells me he loves me I always say 'I love you' back. But I don't know if I do. How can I tell?

A. I often get asked this question by people brought up on a diet of photo-love stories and Barbara Cartland - they tend to view love as a big hole in the road. One minute you're walking innocently along thinking about the price of potatoes and the next, wham! You've fallen straight in it. Truth is, love is less like a pothole, more like porridge. Bear with me on this. Remember the old advert where the children who ate Ready Brek had a warm glow that stayed with them all through the most freezing of days? Think of love as a warm, protective, but invisible blanket that makes crappy things seem not quite so crappy.

Now imagine your boyfriend is your blanket. Imagine taking him off. If you feel shivery and cold, it's love. If you feel liberated and free, it's not. And if you think I'm off my rocker wittering on about porridge and holes in the road when all you wanted was the answer to a simple question, remember, it's not a simple question, and there is no answer.

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