Q. I can't make my man cum. He says its not my fault, and that he still loves sex, but I find this hard to believe. I've now gone off it completely because it feels pointless. Its like running a race without a finishing line - why bother?

A. Does cake taste any less delicious for the lack of a cherry on top? Lovers have sex for the sheer exhilarating experience of it. The finishing line is a pleasure to cross but isn't an essential ingredient - the show can go on without it. Sex is one part your orgasm, one part his and eight parts all the other good stuff. Instead of focusing on the one thing you can't control, work on the parts you can, and take the pressure off him. If he didn't fancy you, he wouldn't get hard in the first place. Making him suffer your disappointment is only going to add to his stress, which could possibly be the cause of the problem. Just be thankful that your cake comes with a cherry.