Friday, August 6, 2010

Q. My girlfriend's just admitted to faking most of her orgasms with me. I'm really angry and confused - am I that bad she has to pretend? How could I not know? I feel so dumb. How will I know if she fakes it again? I don't think I can trust her anymore.

A. OK, you feel betrayed because she lied, foolish because you were oblivious and worried it reflects badly on your skills. All reasonable reactions. But now consider the courage it took for her to 'fess up. She trusted you with the truth and laid herself bare - this isn't the time to stop trusting her. You're shocked and disappointed but you can easily move past this by trying to understand why. Girls fake it because they worry about taking too long, or about the way they smell, taste or look. Some are so keen to please that they forget to please themselves, or they just don't want to be too much trouble. Ask about her reasons. Reassure her you're interested in learning about the real her, no matter how long it takes. Trust is the bedrock of great sex and you should start right here, right now.

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