Thursday, February 25, 2010

Q. I'm so bored of sex with my man. He takes so long to cum and everything has to be perfect for it to happen. He just carries on while I get dry and sore. And if I try to do anything, he says I put him off. I feel like his rubber doll.

A. And just like a rubber doll, you do as you're told without complaining? If you want to be treated like a real human being, start by treating yourself like one. Think about it - why would you put yourself through that? Does he have a right to his orgasm at any cost to yours? Somewhere during our upbringing, women learn that men have to be put first. No matter how much we fight it, intelligent, successful and beautiful women everywhere are (resentfully) putting their needs and discomfort to one side for their men. It happens so naturally that it takes us a while to realise we're doing it. But once we do, we have the chance to change it. Stake a claim on your right not to put up with bad or dull sex anymore. Talk to him, tell him how you feel, and encourage him to try new things. If he isn't willing to consider your feelings, why stay with him? Sex is meant to be the joining of two people, not just one with his orgasm utensil. Stand up for yourself, and prove that there isn't just one way to have an orgasm.

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