Thursday, May 10, 2012

Q.   My ex was really protective, always called me to see how I was and really took care of me.  My new boyfriend doesn't give me as much attention, which makes me feel like he doesn't like me as much.  I don't want to seem clingy, but how can I tell him he needs to show his feelings more?

A.   Firstly, you're going to have to accept that he's a different person and you may not ever get the same attention as your ex gave you.  However, that doesn't mean your new bloke can't change.  You just need to be realistic.  Start by giving feedback on what he does right.  Tell him it makes you feel good and he will be more likely to do it again.  Next, work out what is the most important thing he could do and mention it to him.  Pick a quiet moment together and just say, 'I'd really like it if you did this or this' and tell him how it would make you feel.  Whatever you do, don't start comparing him to your ex.  You have to accept him for who he is.

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