Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Q. My boyfriend is cheating on me via the internet. I checked his chat logs and can see he has cyber-sex with other girls. They show each other their private parts. He also denies to them that he has a girlfriend. The whole thing is breaking my heart. What can I do?

A. Men treat online sex as sideline sex - of no real threat to their relationship. However, his chat logs are not like the hard-copy porn-stash of olden times that partners could even share for a turn-on. Games like this involve one-on-ones with real - if unknown - women. Cyber-sex cheating is a new problem, needing new solutions. You can write your boyfriend off, escape and give your heart time to mend. Or, if you think he's worth it, confront him coolly and tell him that the games stop or you leave. Mean it, or it won't work. Or, and this is for the bold ones amongst us, you can liven up your sex life by being the woman he has cyber-sex with. If you don't live together, get yourself a web-cam, and start playing along. See if it re-ignites your passion for each other, then carry it on in the bedroom in person. If he's been doing it with strangers just for the novelty, then let that novelty be the new, improved, exciting girlfriend he loves. Eliminate the competition!


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