Q. I've been seeing a woman who says she doesn't want to be in a relationship but she's happy to have casual sex. I love the sex, but if I'm honest, I want more. Why does she hold back from me?

A. Casual-sex relationships sound so cool. Two single people getting together now and then to share each other's bodies, have great orgasms and then leave to get on with wholly unconnected lives. But it's a fantasy because one almost always likes the other more, while the other is making do until something better comes along. To be honest, its usually the woman who wants more, while the man is finding excuses not to spend time with her, so this is not a usual situation. However, if she's happy to be getting her sexual needs met by you, but its only for now - don't fool yourself into thinking you can change her mind. If she says she's up for hanging out with you for a while but doesn't want more, that's almost certainly what she means. If you think you might get hurt, leave now. If you think you can detach your emotions and enjoy the sex then relish the arrangement, but keep your eyes open for someone better, just as she is doing.

Q. My boyfriend and I had a fantastic sex life. He used to be dominant in bed, which I loved but the sex has gone downhill since he moved in with me. He says it's because I nag, but I nag because he's useless around the house. Its an awful situation.

A. Us girls talk about how we want tall, strong, sexy alpha males who will throw us over their shoulders and ravish us. AND we expect them to be caring metrosexual men who will vacuum without being asked. Good luck with that! Your sex life doesn't exist in a bubble away from the nagging. How's your man supposed to feel confident about mastering you in bed when he knows that you think he's useless? Living together changes relationship dynamics and it can take time to adjust. In the meantime, book a sexy weekend away in a hotel and remember why you wanted to live together in the first place! :)

Q. Every time we go out, my bloke stares at other women, as if hes searching for eye candy - with me there beside him! Other than this, we have a trusting relationship and I love him. Whenever I try to talk to him about this, he gets annoyed and says I'm overreacting. Am I? Or am I right to be upset?

A. It seems to me its not his roving eye that's the basic malfunction - its his reluctance to keep that roving eye in check, even though it upsets you. His overdoing of the flirty looks suggests his ego needs a little TLC. Talk to him - not about what he does that makes you feel bad - but about what he does that makes you feel wonderful. Also, try explaining that its precisely because you love him that his ogling distresses you, and ask him to stop. Be gentle and sincere, and don't accuse. You want his understanding this time, not a row!

Q. I'm having a cyber affair. It started out as harmless flirting but now I'm totally sexed up and addicted. My boyfriend's thrilled that our sex life is suddenly so great, but he doesn't know why. I'm not being unfaithful, so how come I feel so guilty?

A. Because to some degree you are being unfaithful and you realise that. Fidelity isn't just about keeping your hands out of someone else's pants, its a line we draw that separates how we behave with others and what we keep 'just between the two of us'. It can vary where that line is in all of us, but I'm guessing that what you're sharing with your screen buddy crosses your line. Guilt is our conscience speaking, ignore it and it just gets louder. If you discovered your man was having regular 'cyber sex' with a girl he met in a chat room, would you be happy?

I understand that its a sexy, new type of fun, but why keep it all to yourself? Do some sexy surfing together and get hot, without feeling guilty. There are lots of places to look for fun together.